How Would You Define Home? A Third Culture Kid's Perspective

Home: a journey through cultures, memories, and connections.
家：一段穿越文化、记忆和联系的旅程。
Rumah: sebuah perjalanan melalui budaya, kenangan, dan hubungan.

In this piece, I explore the concept of "home" from the perspective of a third culture kid who has lived in multiple countries and embraced diverse cultures. This article aims to shed light on my journey of self-discovery and offer guidance to others navigating similar paths.

Understanding the TCK Concept

What does "home" mean to you? Is it a physical location, an emotional sanctuary, or a blend of both? For many, home is a single place filled with familiar faces and cherished memories. For third culture kids (TCKs)—individuals raised in a culture different from their parents'—the concept of home is more complex.

After doing my research, the idea of TCK has deepened my understanding of this intricate concept. These insights have highlighted why I behave in certain ways and how my multicultural 'confusing' upbringing has shaped my identity. Such understandings have provided a framework to interpret my experiences and relate to fellow friends who share similar stories.

Cultural Identity (Crisis?)

I often switch languages without even realising it...

My journey as a third culture kid has been one of constant change and adaptation. Born into a Chinese-Indonesian family in Jakarta, I started my early schooling there before moving to Bangka Island. Adapting to a new local malay dialect and culture was challenging, but I learned to fit in.

At 14, I moved to China for high school. Four years later, I relocated to Australia, which I now consider home. Recently, I secured a spot in the USA Diversity Visa (DV) Program. This means I can explore living in the USA in the future, adding another layer to my journey.

Personal experience

Growing up Catholic in a mostly Muslim country, then moving to China and later to Australia, and temporarily stay in Japan has opened my eyes to so many different ways of life. I’ve picked up multiple languages along the way, and gives me this cool ability to connect with various cultures easily.

My religious background is quite the mix too. In my Catholic family, my grandfather was really devout, while my grandmother, with her Chinese roots, followed Confucian traditions. I went to Christian Sunday school activities every weekend and learned about Buddhism for six years in elementary school, even completed Vipassana meditation twice.

My best friend in Vietnam is a devout Buddhist and vegetarian, and she welcomed me into her home many times, which deepened my understanding of Buddhism. When I opened my office in Makassar, I got to know the Muslim community well and learned a lot about Islam. Plus, my ex-bf, an Australian with Aboriginal heritage, introduced me to both local Australian and Aboriginal cultures.

All these experiences have given me a unique worldview. They've made me more appreciative of different perspectives, enriching my sense of self and helping me navigate various cultures.

The Meaning of Home

Home is an evolving narrative shaped by our experiences and relationships.
家是由我们的经历和关系构成的不断发展的故事。

For someone like me, who has lived in different countries, defining home is both complex and personal. Home isn't just a place; it's a mix of places where I've felt alive and connected – It's the bittersweet memory of leaving behind friends and familiar streets, only to find new connections and comfort in foreign lands. It's the realisation that 'home' is not a static concept but an evolving narrative shaped by our experiences and relationships.

The Emotional Aspect

Connection to Place vs. People

The emotional bond to home is more often defined by people than by place.
I found a sense of belonging through relationships. Discovering new traditions, flavors, and ways of life has become integral to my sense of home. Acceptance and shared history can make even unfamiliar places feel like home. For instance, when I moved to Australia, I knew no one, but the people I met made the experience fun and memorable.

Nostalgia and Relocation

This makes it hard to pinpoint what truly feels like home.

It's not just about missing a place but also the experiences and people associated with it. This makes it hard to pinpoint what truly feels like home. For example, I might miss the street food from China, the friends from Thailand, and the school traditions from yet another place, blending all these elements into a complex sense of belonging.

Finding Comfort in Change

Constantly moving and adapting to new cultures can be overwhelming and challenging. However, it has also taught me to find comfort in change and embrace uncertainty. I've learned to appreciate the beauty in diversity and the richness of experiencing different ways of life. Every new environment presents an opportunity to grow and learn, to forge new connections, and to understand the world from a broader perspective. The challenges of adapting have instilled in me resilience and adaptability, qualities that serve me well in all aspects of life. I've come to realize that home is not a place but a feeling, a state of being that I carry within me, no matter where I go. The experiences and memories I've gathered from various corners of the globe have shaped my identity and continue to influence my outlook on life. In the end, constantly moving has been both a journey of self-discovery and a testament to the boundless possibilities that lie beyond our comfort zones.

Home as a Physical Place

The Importance of Physical Spaces

The right physical surroundings can greatly enhance overall well-being and quality of life.

For me, living near water is a game-changer. The calming presence of a lake, river, or ocean not only provides a serene backdrop but also opens up endless possibilities for recreation. Whether it's jogging along the shoreline or savoring a peaceful walk by the water, these activities significantly boost my physical and mental health.

Creating a sense of stability in my physical environment is essential and plays a significant role in my overall well-being. Investing in good living conditions is truly worth it because it becomes a sanctuary where I can recharge, feel inspired, and maintain a positive mindset.

Making Temporary Spaces Feel Like Home

I knew a place was starting to feel like home when I could go back to my daily routine and feel energized...

In fact, new places often stimulated me to do more, as the excitement and motivation of exploring and engaging in activities made me feel more alive.

Connecting with the local community was vital. Joining clubs and attending social events helped me build relationships and feel settled. For example, when I moved to Australia, I joined a local hiking club and attended weekend outings. This not only introduced me to beautiful local trails but also helped me meet like-minded people and make new friends. Another time, in Japan, I joined a language exchange group where locals and foreigners practiced English and Japanese. These interactions were invaluable in helping me feel more at home and integrated into the community.

The Future of Home (?)

It's an opportunity to build new relationships and continue discovering what "home" means.

Exploring New Horizons

Securing a spot in the USA Diversity Visa (DV) Program offers me the opportunity to explore life in the USA, enriching my understanding of what home can be. I plan to experience iconic cities like New York and San Francisco, build new relationships, integrate into diverse communities, expand my current business, new business ideas and potentially further my education.

Conclusion

Home is where your heart is.
家是心之所在。
Rumah adalah tempat hati Anda berada.

For me, as globalization reshapes our world, the concept of home will continue to evolve, offering both challenges and opportunities. Ultimately, home is where you feel alive, content, and inspired, surrounded by people who understand and value you. "Home is where your heart is." It's not just about your location, but the contentment you feel, the company you keep, and the bonds you forge. Whether you're a third culture kid or someone rooted in one place, may you find your own sense of home and cherish the journey of discovering it. It is where you want to spend your time to learn and grow.

Call to Action

Share your own experiences and definitions of home in the comments below or on social media. How has living abroad or traveling influenced your sense of home? What makes you feel at home in different cultures? Your stories are valuable, and we’d love to hear them.

Explore more about home and identity in our related articles:

• Exploring the World Through Languages: From Bahasa to Chinese to English to Nihongo
• 永远不要寻找自我 Find Yourself: Never

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